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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
" T; [$ @. e8 F# Y* K
" M9 M9 @) V- L |2 s# f+ i5 Y' h2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
0 O1 ?* m- l* ]/ n2 M" D, h; ^" Q0 `# r8 e1 J
男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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) B7 p4 s# o( o0 Q( k' H3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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1 d+ v) P7 x% j0 u* C老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。/ W! I5 U; l4 t$ v; |
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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7 M' G' l3 T' p& p% h/ V笑死我了。。。 J+ V& w( }% ]# J ?$ }
; [: ?* _0 a' p/ X5 T8 O% K4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
" ?- }7 n5 |$ {: s4 e/ `, o% A8 T& U* q. Y3 K: N) k3 ]! [
可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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- q0 Z, C8 m' w2 [ n: E我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!$ d* B- ^! n$ ]8 Y+ J2 W, r0 }
3 C$ d/ s5 q4 ?; p+ x9 k& P5 p+ r她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!5 c) L, }$ K, v- Z7 w( R
7 A; J; j: x' L9 Z晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”* n. @5 X8 \0 T+ p# ]" ]- \" [. U
+ l( U( {* {( e
恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，, O& e* m2 P) C+ I9 L+ M$ e( R! A7 C
2 [, J$ ?7 l/ n4 }就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”0 K, B6 L8 m7 H
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
% d+ H+ z2 X3 |: d, I
m2 W+ h. ]! F6 p! E) Q9 ]1 K3 f我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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7 ~6 I; T+ P7 `( D一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。0 q2 |0 `0 J& n1 |9 n
4 M) m S, P; U! a: v/ }3 i6 }
当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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: `9 e$ }4 a- R0 b6 A( E) {我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？7 f, ]4 L/ t) N: D
. k. n/ h: X& p# i我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。 W- W3 f8 @/ P% d
U; ~ I0 O5 X$ N3 ^9 p3 Q; \女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
8 P% x# Z' e, y5 y; g) [- Q5 T6 d/ [1 [/ O4 A/ Y. {8 u' F
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当前离线
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