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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”5 l) Y3 H3 u! h. y
' J2 a4 o6 V1 F4 O2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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* M* ~4 G+ U5 {4 |( }男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。& p5 h Q" x$ W# e- t$ B
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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% b) ?8 ^7 [' ~; g女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。$ Z! b, c' r; W# u$ V
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笑死我了。。。- G: H/ R% B0 R7 }
2 m- V, f, l. Z: O4 V, D9 t4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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' O+ N. G3 K3 [0 r' P+ x我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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- {) ]6 T1 l3 ?- v8 k4 ?她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!$ u% C/ ^$ `2 x' L
: j; ^: R0 o& ?& V6 ?5 |: S晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”( C& h a7 g" L7 j
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，8 V* `! u. G+ w" b7 ~5 U2 x9 H
- ]; M# U) q: z就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”7 c* s4 m) k! K7 m
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…5 n( o7 _3 O/ L& i2 O) }
* d, f6 q1 N) q: H1 r/ ?0 X5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，/ H( `& Q% f2 C5 L8 e% t
0 w7 e, x% J) ^我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。3 t* [& A. v! B1 a. `# e
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。, o0 ~0 r f6 O; Q+ N/ W: ^; p Y g, g0 m
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？( |& ?" U6 U2 x7 ^1 T: M$ @8 j; |
9 l( i/ R& L o1 S/ G- l我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…' @, X5 ]& X; c
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当前离线
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