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大庄家娱乐城祝教师节快乐——教师节段子
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带起节奏,送来欢乐8 X2 L7 c! ^4 h; C6 d

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今天是教师节,大家一起来发段子吧!& {- t- e- p) W/ V& l& Z* O
我先来!
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A说:“今天考试我交了白卷。”B说:“哎,我也交了白卷。
- o# m; H% w1 H同学A生气的说:“你怎么能交白卷呢,老师会以为我们抄袭的!”
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" X% i9 f; j6 s4 s$ F2 n  ~- L8 [& @+ F深夜,王老师批改完最后一份试卷,疲惫地拧开了收音机,想听音乐放松一下。收音机里传来了dj的声音:"xx中学高三级x班全班同学一同把这首歌奉献给他们敬爱的王xx老师听,感谢他多年来给他们出了无数道练习题(尤其是这年),使他们得到了宝贵的练习机会……"听到这,王老师的眼睛湿润了,心力交瘁的脸上露出一安慰的笑意。dj又继续说:"……现在就让我们一起来听这首歌,李惠敏的《你不会有好结果》…"
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一位年轻女教师初次执教小学生美术课。她在黑板上画一个苹果问学生说:“这是什么呀?”学生异口同声回答:“是屁股。”女教师哭着去找校长,校长一听大怒,跟着老师来到教室训斥学生说:“你们越来越不像话了,为什么又把老师气哭了?”回头看了一看“啊!还在黑板上画了个屁股!”
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老师去吃自助餐]
昨天老妈教弟弟做作业,弟弟不动脑筋思考,8 j9 s8 Z; u, {1 w: F  d1 p8 K
每道题都问妈妈,妈妈怒了:“你每道题都不会,干脆我帮你做算了!”7 ~' d6 ]( s. i1 a8 a, k
弟弟淡淡地说:“不行!字迹不一样会被老师发现的!”
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考场上一女生抱怨说:“老师,天气太热了,风扇都没风!”谁料老师说:“别急,等会儿看到试卷你就心凉了。”
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一帅哥毕业后到一所女子学校任教,由于年轻的男老师级少,& {- H; t$ ~' Q3 n0 M+ L. ?
所以非常受欢迎。# {) ]5 b$ ~/ b( Y; h, i6 m- O
第一堂课,有一位女学生忘记带课本,帅哥老师请她站起来,
9 r  G* p, i" f0 `; b/ a; K问其他同学该怎么处罚。她们很有默契的齐声说:“老师亲她一个!”
) k1 y' ~& \8 S. F& l大家等着看老师的反应。老师瞄了那位同学一眼,) j. ?$ m2 }1 m# `2 _5 }; U) s
回答:“不可以处罚老师!”
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今天听见两个老师在讨论管理上课吃东西的事情说:2 n& c' w6 U- W( s' O9 B
有个学生老在我上课的时候偷吃瓜子,我毫不客气,见一次抓一次,一抓就是一大把!!!% H1 Y) A5 F- R3 T0 w
不知道是不是我的错,那个上课吃东西的学生,被我抓过几次,但最近一两个月都没看过他上课吃东西了,我整个人瘦了很多。
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一小学教师,最近在学车却不怎么喜欢去练车,教练问:“为什么经常没来学车?”, z. C: _" G0 Q0 T
她:“在学校都是我骂学生,来你这边老是被你骂,我很不爽!!!”
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上高中嘴馋,几个同学合计买烧烤吃,不想带回来的时候被班主任发现没收了,结果第二天班主任闹了一天的肚子。
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生物老师非洲野猪
$ o6 w9 m- x( D& r- @' x9 q! X生物老师正兴致勃勃在台上描述非洲野猪的长相,偶尔眼光一扫台下,竟发现多数学生在打瞌睡。
& ]# G! g6 f1 K* Q* i于是大为恼火,喝道:“你们要看着我啊!不看我,你们怎么知道非洲野猪长的是什么样子?”
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老师:小明,你的美劳作品太好了,明天学校要派你参加全市的比赛。
0 y$ Q0 q" i* j/ k小明:不行
3 N( b( s% ?2 B$ v9 c' V% |1 R老师:為什麼?" e& v7 `2 f1 X  m) U0 k" v
小明:劳作是我爸做的,他明天要上班
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妈妈:小明,你看,妹妹考100分,你才50分
" e0 M/ Z/ k: Y% c4 l小明:我是照你的话做的1 f9 C6 ]; ^3 A& \2 l- S. ~* k  I9 X9 }
妈妈:我说了什麼?
' J$ I. k$ F4 X小明:你说我只要有妹妹的一半就很好了
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小外甥女刚上一年级,有次语文考试得了74分,
. {2 l) ]9 [6 @8 r她拿成绩单回来的时候她爸妈很生气,
9 [9 b' [2 o  M5 W2 u' P5 C就问你为什么只考了74]
老师:“]
老师:现在上‘急救课’“先做口对口人工呼吸”“这样重复做,会怎样?”' ~- ^0 Z$ f5 M! A2 \' E; `
小明:有人会告你性骚扰
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小明放学回到家就问:麻麻,你不说女人都喜欢被夸吗?8 P5 Q" [2 k. @, [
妈妈说:是啊,为什么这么问?. w+ g* [# N3 z- u* G  Y7 s) |# u2 E5 v
小明沮丧着说:今天老师穿着超短裙来上课,我就夸老师,你的内裤好漂亮啊!
% V6 P9 \; R9 h8 @' s# E. }3 A然后,老师就给我撵出去了!!!

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大家每人发一个关于教师段子在跟贴后面,一起用关于教师的笑话来庆祝伟大的教育工作者的节日。
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你的这个段子还是比较有趣的哦
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你这个段子还是不错的咯。
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4#
祝老师节日快乐吧,现在教师的地位也提高了
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:) :( :D :'( :@ :o
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:hug: :victory: :time: :kiss: :handshake: :call:
:) :( :D :'( :@ :o
:P :$ ;P :L :Q :lol
:loveliness: :funk: :curse: :dizzy: :shutup: :sleepy:
:hug: :victory: :time: :kiss: :handshake: :call:
:hug: :victory:
:) :( :D :'( :@ :o
:P :$ ;P :L :Q :lol
:loveliness: :funk: :curse: :dizzy: :shutup: :sleepy:
:hug: :victory: :time: :kiss: :handshake: :call:
:hug: :victory: :time: :kiss: :handshake: :call:
:hug: :victory: :time: :kiss: :handshake: :call:
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