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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”8 Q5 M; r# H( t" _
2 s% _+ G& v7 {0 r3 F2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
2 w) h+ Q/ R" B7 A* g- k4 n" _% v, C7 k; A+ I1 k& i
男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”* S6 U6 @3 u G8 `+ a: g: G% ]
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。6 J5 j8 S0 C" h& A/ a9 V1 x; s/ a
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。9 P, x7 ?+ B' f4 }7 A& d* i, W
( d d& w1 ]! m# w* s6 G' @女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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笑死我了。。。 L/ s" v( F$ e# M' A; w3 @
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，% _3 J# `" {9 [1 k4 c- ?: Q
* r- S$ h2 v0 ]: N4 M/ t可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，2 Y! a. F4 r ^& g) P
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!2 r9 y; p p/ @+ B. l- H( T
# e" B1 w. ]: Q/ _+ F0 K7 E晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”; i2 }* ?. i& C7 c9 d
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，2 Q# R' s, z2 z8 E3 z8 Q7 }4 O
+ W; C- O* ?, p5 E就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”) B$ a! t9 ]$ H) f% @2 _- {
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，" r! o% a( D" K3 B
6 |8 y2 W! T- n我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。: e' _- ~4 y4 H+ k# A
; w7 d' y x) A: ?' S5 ~, e女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？: i' U9 o' G( f9 E. p
F' D6 P, p4 X( N# g我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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( o$ c: R/ O( W女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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